{"id":8945,"date":"2012-02-07T10:02:22","date_gmt":"2012-02-07T17:02:22","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.backwoodshome.com\/blogs\/ClaireWolfe\/?p=8945"},"modified":"2012-02-07T10:02:22","modified_gmt":"2012-02-07T17:02:22","slug":"yes-you-are-a-terrorist-mr-jones","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.clairewolfe.com\/blog\/2012\/02\/07\/yes-you-are-a-terrorist-mr-jones\/","title":{"rendered":"Yes, YOU are a terrorist, Mr. Jones"},"content":{"rendered":"

The End of the American Dream recently took apart two of the FBI’s infamous<\/a> “look for a terrorist under every bed” brochures. You know, the ones that tell members of different professions whom they should report to the fedgov. In this case, one is a literal<\/i> “look under the bed,” since the brochure in question addresses all us EEEEEvil terrorists who might be checking into hotels and motels.<\/p>\n

But as frequent-contributor MJR discovered, all manner of professions get their own<\/a> terrorist-hunting help from the fibbies. (The differences and similarities between the flyers are fascinating.)<\/p>\n

Among other things, tattoo artists<\/a> — yes tattoo artists!<\/i> — are advised to suspect (in what has become the FBI’s standard tortured style of English) “People or Groups Who Make repeated returns with multiple individuals requesting identical tattoos.”<\/p>\n

Hey, in that case I know nine Dreaded Terrorists<\/a> who need to be slammed into Gitmo right away! And I’m sure they’re terrorists because in addition to requesting identical tattoos, they’ve also all used multiple aliases (another Sure Sign). At the time they got their suspicious tats, they were going by the aliases Frodo, Samwise, Galdalf, Legolas, Merry, Pippin, Boromir, Gimli, and — the multiple-aliasing obvious EEEEEvil mastermind, Aragorn, aka Strider, aka The Dunedan, aka Longshanks, Wingfoot, Telcontar, Elfstone, and Thorongil.<\/p>\n

The Fatherland (Achtung!) is clearly in danger as long as they — and we! — remain on the loose.<\/p>\n

And don’t imagine I’m joking. The Fellowship of the Ring really were terrorists, at least from Sauron’s point of view. They wanted to overthrow the government of Mordor, didn’t they? And they hoped to achieve it via a highly destructive sneak attack into the heartland of that realm.<\/p>\n

And we. Well, the evidence against us has been overwhelming<\/a> for some time.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The End of the American Dream recently took apart two of the FBI’s infamous “look for a terrorist under every bed” brochures. You know, the ones that tell members of different professions whom they should report to the fedgov. In this case, one is a literal “look under the bed,” since the brochure in question addresses all us EEEEEvil terrorists who might be checking into hotels and motels. But as frequent-contributor MJR discovered, all manner of professions get their own terrorist-hunting help from the fibbies. (The differences and similarities between the flyers are fascinating.) Among other things, tattoo artists —…<\/p>\n

Continue readingYes, YOU are a terrorist, Mr. Jones<\/span><\/a><\/div>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[11,12,16],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-8945","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-government","category-guns-and-gun-rights","category-humor","ratio-natural","entry"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.clairewolfe.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8945","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.clairewolfe.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.clairewolfe.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.clairewolfe.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.clairewolfe.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=8945"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.clairewolfe.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8945\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.clairewolfe.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=8945"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.clairewolfe.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=8945"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.clairewolfe.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=8945"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}