Today I promised myself a contemplative day.
The last few weeks have again been chaotic and stressful. That should have been over last Friday, but instead Saturday and Sunday became more stressful.
Again, we’re not talking any big deal. Just the stress of life plunging onward in what’s actually quite a nice way. But anyhow, I promised myself a no-stress Monday.
A contemplative day begins with either not turning on the computer at all or using it for wake up and morning chores, then closing it down. But it’s more than that. It’s turning off the phone and being glad I’m not expecting anybody to come to the door. It’s meditating and spending time with the dogs. Time not even to snuggle down with a good book because that would take me out of the moment. Time to just BE.
Um … well, that’s the theory.
The reality is that I last three or four hours without going online. And instead of hours devoted to Being In The Moment, I’m constantly telling myself, “No, you don’t need to know right this minute when Dire Straits was founded,” and “I wonder what’s going on with that discussion about The Last Samurai?”
While I nearly always give in eventually (Leslie Howard, for anyone who needs urgently to know, died when his plane was shot down by Nazis, possibly on the rumor that Winston Churchill was aboard), I do try to keep my computer use “lite.”
But the day usually ends up with me planning projects, paying bills, and cleaning or doing tiny repairs to the house.
I feel better for doing these things, but bad for not getting a better handle on my monkey-brainedness. “After all, I tell myself, if you really want peace, stillness, silence, and serenity, you’ll *&^# well sit your &%# down and start workin’ at ’em.”
Still, I feel better for such a day.
This morning, for instance, I laid out a plan for a closet and some shelves that had been ghosting formlessly around my brain for months. Then I looked at my finances and fulfilled a much-overdue pledge to myself to restore my neglected envelope system of budgeting. I paid off my bill at the hardware store (where they let me open an account simply by giving them my contact information, BTW; I love small towns!). Paying that bill closed out a minor construction project that got ugly before it was done. The emotional closure was glorious, even as it was painful to watch the sum disappear.
So in theory, I keep wanting all that Zen-like stillness and to gain discipline over my very non-orderly, trivia-collecting brain. In reality, my brain and all the rest of me find this far more satisfying.
Of course, since I never manage to get to the meditative mountaintop, I really don’t know what I’m missing. But by golly, my bills always get paid on time and the dust bunnies scatter in terror of me.
I can be sitting perfectly still and still have a brain racing at warp speed. I gave up trying to train it to do otherwise long ago. And when the guilt sets in for sitting and doing nothing, that idea goes right out the window. Zen people are amazing but I’ve learned I’m never going to be one of them.
Your envelope system works really well. I always use it whenever there’s any money to divide up.
You’ve found the right solution. Overload (read “multi-tasking”) is a sign to back off and pace yourself.
I gave up on meditation a long time ago; my mind is too busy and I start squirming. OTOH, accomplishing those things that need to be done is so satisfying that my mind doesn’t need any Zen treatment — and a good night’s sleep usually follows.
I’m not sure “peace, stillness, silence, and serenity” are the answer anyway, or the human norm. Meeting the challenge — getting the chores done, or solving the problem — is the best way to maintain peace of mind. Then you have time to read that book, or study the clouds.
Nuthin. Looking @ the pots on page 44.
Again.
If you are interested in “quality,” one excellent option is Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_ss_i_0_10?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=zen%20and%20the%20art%20of%20motorcycle%20maintenance&sprefix=zen+and+th%2Caps%2C222&rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Azen%20and%20the%20art%20of%20motorcycle%20maintenance I probably ought to read it again.
Curiosity nails me too on the computer. I just wish I could remember the most recent trivia.
Some brains just need stuff to chew on, or else they spin out of control.
I meditate best while doing something mindless. Scraping deer hides or sitting staring into a fire seem to be the most productive mind-times for me.
Your body and mind will tell you what they need, and sometimes it’s not what you think you need.
When I want a contemplative day I gather a sack of empty cans and plastic bottles, and a couple of my .22s, and head for the range. No training, no teaching, no OMG scenarios, just ballistic kick-the-can.
I have a lot of little “fun” projects I do after taking care of business-everything from illustrated lamp shades (get’em for 50 cents at ReStore, build lamps for each,and usually give them away. The fun is in the doing, not the having)to going on long bike rides just to look at things. I have illustrated bill payment envelopes(it’s kinda fun) and tax returns/envelopes ( I got a complimentary letter back once from the state on this-so humans do work there! At least at the state level-I still think the IRS is staffed by Vogons). It’s a way to make something normally dull sort of interesting.
I know waay too much trivia( male Gremlins are Gremlins,female Gremlins are Fifinellas, and baby Gremlins are Widgets) , and I figure all that useless information probably has crowded out something important.
Huh. Hadn’t known that about Leslie Howard. Wouldn’t have known without the Internet. But I can give it up any time. Really.
😉
Just to keep in perspective, humans were designed in the Pleistocene Era. It wasn’t an easy time. Maybe we aren’t supposed to spend that much time in contemplation.
I have faced up to the fact I am an Internet addict. I need a Computers Anonymous group to attend. 12 steps or whatever. I try to get my ass outside every day to split firewood or clean the muck out of the gutters. Hard to do in winter, in rainy western Oregon. But I’m good when I have managed to get out there for a while. I need to take a motorcycle trip next Spring, just going around the state.
BTW speaking about motorcycles, “Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance” is one of my favorite all-time books. Just re-read it recently. The later edition has a very sad announcement at the end, though.
Had an interesting day myself. The people who bought the lot next door (where the house burned) are finally going to do something with it. They’ve been moving the dirt around for two weeks, bringing more in and moving that around… I have no idea what they’re doing, but see no signs of an actual pad being prepared to build anything. We’ll see.
Anyway, today a man from the electric co-op came to the door and said that my elect. would be shut off for an hour or so to let them move a power pole next door. So, I shut down the computer and prepared to spend the morning with no electricity. Had planned to read by the dining room window, but got caught up watching the men work with their giant trucks, pulling power poles up out of the ground like garden weeds… and didn’t open the book more than a few times.
Then they came over into my yard and started to work with my pole, so I went out to talk to them. Seems they discovered that the wires holding the pole up were bad and it might have come down in the next storm! Oh me. So, the power was off most of the day.
Anyway, I just got back to work here, and after reading about Claire’s efforts to contemplate, realized that I’d had a very interesting, entertaining and restful day. In my experience, those days come when they come, and can seldom be planned. Just open the door…
Oh, and Laddie enjoyed the day as well. He doesn’t bark much, but he’s firmly convinced that all trucks need to be WATCHED, and occasionally escorted at top speed across the width of the yard. The guy next door is going to make that lot into a work yard for his business, which involves a lot of big trucks. Laddie is going to be very busy. 🙂
Zen and the Art of Motorcyle Maintenance is something I ought to re-read, again. It’s been years since I last read it. It feels as if the appropriate thing to do upon finishing it would be to find an old R60 or R80, and hit the road. The Pacific Coast Highway would make a nice trip.
@Paul, I thought you were in WY. Well, what do I know? Should I ever have time, and a motorcyle, I’ll look you up.
Completely off-topic, but in keeping with my blogging-by-proxy act, I ran across this great vid of Tommy Emmanuel playing Classical Gas.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S33tWZqXhnk
That’s more at the other end of the spectrum from Zen-like stillness. 🙂
Paul B: I presume you are talking about how his son ended up being stabbed by a mugger and dying. It’s just another commentary on our society, I guess. And a man who has had an alcohol problem told me his car had been on auto pilot; it would drive itself to the bars. I find my legs have a similar problem; when I walk in my house they make the proper turns to have me standing in front of my computer.
jed: That was a nice video. I did discover, though, that it sounded better if I closed my eyes 🙂
I enjoy lots of music with my eyes closed. Well, for a long time, there wasn’t a visual component anyway, unless you enjoyed watching the vinyl spin, or the reels going around. I imagine there were some records where the center label was printed with a spiral, or some other visually interesting artwork.
But, as a sort-of guitar player, I really have to watch, when it’s possible. Particularly somebody like him. Or Richard Thompson.
Do you get credit for things purchased via vender on Amazon or just the things from Amazon proper?
Much of the finest heavy metal ever put down on analog tape is out of print. Archive it whist thou may!
Damn those Nazis! They knew Leslie was a Jew. That’s why they shot his plane down. Actually, the Bay of Biscay and the airspace above was a clotted war zone: surfaced U-boats trying to do a quick break-out into the Atlantic, Brit planes attacking the subs, German planes attacking the Brits. Lotsa planes got shot down, and no fine distinctions were made between military and “civilian”, whatever the markings.
A.G. — Good question; thanks for asking. Yes, I do get credit for anything purchased on Amazon, both Amazon proper and from Marketplace vendors.
@jed, sometimes I am in Wyoming, other times in Oregon. I try not to be too predictable. 🙂
I was going to question the association of Nazis and the downing of the aircraft, but then I remembered the Democrats killed Bin Laden, so it’s an accurate attribution.