Or is it hermitude? I don’t know. But in any case, I haven’t forgotten my intention to commence a period of deeper hermitness.
The world has been too much with me, late and soon. That whole JPFO business was hard and bitter. The aftermath’s been no picnic, either. Even though you and some renewed work for the Backwoods Home print ‘zine have risen to help me through the money part of that, the emotional part is just … whammo.
But I’m not here to talk about that. I’m here to forge a plan. You can probably help. You always do.
—–
Since first blogging about this a month ago, I haven’t gotten very far. Or I don’t feel I’ve gotten very far. There are some aspects about how to do this, how long to do this, and what I want from doing this that I haven’t made a millimeter of progress on.
One — minor! — thing I just did, though, was to create a topic sub-category under “Mind and Spirit” called “The Retreat.” This is the first post carrying that tag.
Huge, eh?
—–
But anyhow, some of the very biggest questions, I simply bang my brain on. And the brain comes out the loser.
HOW do I cut back on email?
If I try to limit my computer time strictly enough to break the addiction, will I listen to myself, or will I rebel and sneak “just one” morning on the computer? And from then on it’s the slippery slope to debauchery and degradation checking the damned nooz for two hours a day.
I say I want to focus on other aspects of creativity. But I know me. Creativity, as in either art or book writing, scares me and most of the time I’ll do anything to avoid it. See “computer addiction,” above.
What do I really want to achieve? Or is this more about what I want to get away from?
There are questions I hesitate to bring up here because they would blow away any last shreds of wise guruhood any of you longtime readers might be tempted to credit me with. Even the most conscious life gets muddled at times. Or call it reaching the place in the dark woods where paths diverge and you don’t know where to turn. But it feels as if I’m failing to live up to something.
What, I don’t know. There’s a lot I don’t know right now.
I even got away to the beach and walked and walked and walked and walked (usually the cure or inspiration for anything) and neither the brain nor the dilemmas budged.
—–
Yet at the same time, things are working in the ether.
I have the idea that I’ll do the hermitude in two stages. That’s new. The first stage will begin somewhere between October 15 and the first of November and go to December 31. At that point I’ll evaluate what’s working, what’s not, what more or what less I might want to do, etc.
I also just realized that while this is a lot about things I want to get away from, I’ve been taking the wrong path by thinking “I want less email” or “I should limit my computer time.” The real beginning of the path is, “I want fewer obligations.”
Heck, fewer??? I want no damned obligations! I want to be as un-responsible as a stoned surfer on a Southern California beach.
Not irresponsible, mind you. Things still have to be done with honor and responsibility.
But see? Right there, I depart from that surfer and go down the always-uphill rocky road of obligation.
You see the problem. Anyhow, every other thing I need to get off my mind and body is related to that: obligation — meeting others’ expectations or following through on what my own standards tell me I must do, even if that little brat down deep in my soul says, “Poo on that!”
—–
One reason I don’t know exactly when to start is because of a volunteer commitment I made long ago and must now fulfill because the other, better, person who usually does it has been direly ill.
But the rescue group did agree to scale the scope back severely on the most major project because there was no way to pull together a huge community effort in the next few weeks, as they’d originally planned. So I’m doing a few things here and there, but no monster project oh thank heaven. Leaning more towards 10/15 now than 11/1.
One thing they asked me to do was see if we could get one of our cats onto a TV show. I’m not familiar with the show, but I think it’s on Animal Planet and features cats whose personalities and habits can ruin people’s relationships. Sort of a cat whisperer thing. We’ve got a shelter cat who’s potentially one of those ruiners, and right now she’s ruining all her own chances of getting adopted. So even though this show doesn’t normally do animals in shelters (far as I know) one of our chief cat ladies asked me to edit a letter asking the show to help our catty-beast.
Her copy was really helpful, but it was what you’d expect from a non-writer. “Hello, I’d like to introduce myself and the group I work with …”
But this is TV. Visual. And this is making a pitch. Grab ’em by the ears in the first dozen words.
So it was fun working with the cat lady and our photographer (who is first class) to come up with something bright, then I put it all together into a .pdf that opens, “This is Special. Special lives on a wall.” It went on not only to talk about the crazy cat but to emphasize what a scenic area this is and blah blah blah. Pix of our extremely colorful and cutely designed little shelter, etc.
That was a little over a week ago. Cat Lady just emailed to say the casting director of the show called and we’re in the running.
Now they want video of the cat actually making a volunteer bleed. But that, oh thank you, is somebody else’s job.
Sounds like Jackson Galaxy’s “My Cat From Hell” show- or something along those lines. My beloved Chocolate almost needs to be on that show- she is loving and so sweet until she decides she wants to bite. Then I need to just walk away and let her cool off.
When I need creative inspiration, I never know where it will come from. It might be from sitting alone, thinking- it might come from doing some horrible task, or it might come from browsing the internet and reading emails. I never see it coming until it’s there. (Not comparing my creativity to yours, of course!) So, trying to eliminate something from my life is sometimes counterproductive. I do better just going with whatever life tosses my way- within limits.
Yep, Kent. That’s the show.
I can also see how the hang-loose/never-know-what’s-going-to-happen approach works. In a way I envy it. It doesn’t work so well for me, though. I need to have quiet to process all that input.
I think the problem might be that you are planning your unplugging….If you are un-ing something then it helps to not plot and plan the whole thing out, you just stop or at least stop planning/scheduling/setting up rules. Or at the very least, when you can get away with it, do the opposite of how you’d normally react/respond to something (that’s the shortcut way LOL)….
If you want to change your lifestyle, you have to change you’re way of thinking. Those of us who have such deeply entrenched personality habits almost have to approach change like addicts do with their rehab – one day or one item at a time. Example would be to just decide that today *or whatever day* you aren’t going to answer emails. Then don’t even think about it, when it creeps into your brain as an OMG I SHOULD be doing it – ignore it. (Or if you’re playing the opposite game, you’d do the opposite as you normally would have done things.) As you’re finding out, it’s not that you’re changing your lifestyle as much as it’s going to mean changing your brain responses.
Once you have a couple of times or days like a surfer, and see how it turns out, it’ll be easier to slip into surfer mode more often….But I’m assuming you’re looking for more spontaneity, too, and that never works when you plan it, hehe…..But really, stop being so hard on yourself – you will progress even if you don’t think you are….I think the real question you should ask is what does Claire want to do? Not specific things like emails or obligations, what do YOU want to do that day or that situation. If you feel like emails, go for it; if you feel like writing great copy that makes TV shows interested (go you!!!), go for it. If not, then pass on it. Think less “advance” and more “in the moment”….
Don’t be surprised if you’re not really a hermit either….once you find out where your own interests are, you may find you have a ton more time and also have time to socialize 🙂 But whether you intend to do things differently or have it done to you (like some of us) – it never happens correctly right away, takes a while to adjust to it 🙂
One thing I’ve discovered over the years is that, at least for me, it’s difficult to intentionally miss a target. Focus on doing, not avoiding. IOW instead of “I’m going to spend two hours a day not checking news,” try “I’m going to spend two hours a day walking the beach/playing with furfolk/re-releasing How to Kill the Job Culture/cleaning the house.”
Okay, sorry about that last. I just finished a story where the heroine would sweep the floor, because that’s where she could commune with her mother’s memory.
I seem to recall you once kept a journal; are you still doing that? While _on the road to_ hermitting (not actually there yet, but until Oct. 15, Nov. 1, or Dec. 31), why not keep a journal: to see what you’re doing, how you feel about it, and how you mentally and actually approach all the pro and con things that arise in your life? It might give you a handle on how to alter or eliminate any of them. At the end of each day, simply assess your feelings on paper – and then put it aside to start a new day.
You’re worrying about it too much. And for many reasons, you’re worrying too much about the rest of the world. The world is not too much with us – we have become too much with it; we *let it* inundate us by our own actions and attitude.
Hermitting is not really the goal anyway, is it? To lessen the responsibilities is another way of saying “Simplify”. To determine where you want to be, you may have to reduce your own expectations. And that sounds like what you are fighting now.
Hope you don’t disappear for a while, methinks you accomplish more than you realize. Something that helps me every few years is to reread some books that kind of put things in order and help outlook somewhat, Michael Talbot; Beyond the Quantum and Holographic Universe, and Jane Roberts- Seth books, the first three in particular, Seth Speaks, Seth Material, Nature of Personal Reality. Probably not for everyone, not religion, but ideas that make sense at least to me, could create more questions than answers though but in a good way.
Just a suggestion – but put your projects on a list. And refuse to even look at your computer until you finish one project. Then catch up on your email, your nooz, your whatever, and start the next project.
OK, earning a writer’s living might interfere and make you turn on the computer more often – but you’re a bright girl and you get the point. Just refuse to go near the brain-sucker until something else is done, then allow yourself to plug in a while, then un-plug again. It works for me, and as a former blogger / addict I still have a serious ‘nooz’ habit.
A while back, someone sent me a great book, the lessons within being adaptable to your situation. I highly recommend you read a book called “How to Kill the Job Culture Before It Kills You”
Replace job with obligation, and you’re on your way!
Interesting. Not only your suggestions, but the fact that my reactions to them are telling me a lot. Even the ones I recoil from (no lists!) tell me something I need to know.
I laugh at Larry’s sweep-the-floor suggestion and jw’s take-your-own-advice hint. (Larry, even we women who may not “commune” understand the power of a good housecleaning.)
Naturegirl’s “one day at a time” seems very right … but only if I know what I want that “one day” to do or not do as part of my life. A goal or a vision is needed even if an actual plan may be counterproductive.
And journaling helps. A lot. Always has for me. There’s just some barrier I need to get past right now that I haven’t figured out how to hurdle. Or go around. Or dig under. Or blast out of my way. And words will help get me there; just not yet.
Oh, and RW, thank you. NOT planning to disappear. And I am reading some very helpful books. Old Seth has always left me cold. But at the moment I’m getting a lot from the intriguing (and often amusing) The Antidote: Happiness for people who can’t stand positive thinking by Oliver Burkeman and am hopeful about Sam Harris’s Waking Up: A guide to spirituality without religion, which I’ve just begun reading.
But yes, you’re right about some books that are very moving but generate more questions than answers.
Not sure “addict” is an accurate analogy for any of the various “plug in” problems, but I think there is at least a fair connection to something I’ve observed with alcoholics and many others with compulsions and dependencies like that. Rationalization.
Now Claire, I don’t think you have any serious problem with rationalization by any means, but it might have a small role in your compulsion. The “obligations” you are trying to get away from are all good things, not destructive like binge drinking, and yet they are obviously harming you to some degree. BUT they are “good things” and things you otherwise support and love and want to see get done – which is a real problem because you probably wind up with a lot of false guilt when you can’t fulfill all of the good things you see needing attention. So, you talk yourself into it by reciting all of the reasons you “should” and ignoring pretty much all the rest. But the rest is still in your mind, and nags at you. resulting in seriously conflicting emotions at times, and loads of false guilt.
So, truly recognize your own self worth, that your health and happiness are worth at least as much or more than the lives of sick animals or even some people… and that you must nurture your self in order to have anything to give to them. And when you can get a firm hold on that and start to exercise it, the false guilt will drop away and no longer be triggered by the next well meaning soul who comes to you with another burning NEED. You remain free to choose to do something with it, and just as free to say no thank you – legitimately based on your own NEED as much as anything.
A retreat, a period of solitude and contemplation is very wise, but do consider the problem of the false guilt imposed on you by all those seeking your help for their very worthy projects. Embrace the projects you want to do. Lose the guilt. 🙂
MamaLiberty — You have absolutely nailed major aspects of my current state. Compulsion (rather than addiction, though of course the two are related). Guilt, perceived needs and responsibilities, avoiding core issues — all of that.
And rationalization — which I normally wouldn’t think of as rationalization because I’m buffaloing myself about the good things I “must” do.
In a way (and I suppose this is typical), it’s not other people’s needs, wants, and requests that burden me. It’s my own expectations of myself, my own standards for what’s “the right thing” to do.
One thing that has happened many times and is going on right now: I get involved in some group endeavor where people agree to do certain things. Then they don’t follow through. Which leaves me not only feeling alone with my own voluntarily assumed burden, but sticks me with consequences for the obligations others so casually abandon. (And OMG, do I envy them their ability to walk away from commitments without a twinge!) Even if I don’t step in and try to do other people’s work for them (and I usually don’t), I’m still stuck with having to try to persuade them to meet their obligations. I’m still stuck with sleepless nights because I see a project failing and feel that it is, or will become, my failure. And it kills me. Just kills me.
The only solution in situations like that is to abandon my own commitment to a project (but not by just walking away). But that, too, just kills me.
People tell me I’ve had an influence. But I see only failure in situations like these — as well, of course, as in the much bigger failures to restore liberty (or even sanity!) to an increasingly totalitarian world. How can I be any sort of “success” in influencing people if, repeatedly, I can’t even persuade the people around me to fulfill the obligations they voluntarily agreed to?
Sorry for the rant. I need to get this stuff out.
This is real general, Claire, haven’t taken the time to flesh it out in my mind at all. But it seems to me that whenever you go through one of your ‘want to unplug’ periods, you concentrate exclusively on what you need stop doing, or undo, or give up. It sounds like a plan for a failed diet.
I didn’t make progress toward happy hermit-ness until I had something to work toward, rather than just things to give up.
What do you hope to gain? Formulating that in your own mind might help you form a positive plan, rather than a list of relinquishments. If you begin doing other things that bring you joy, perhaps they’ll crowd out the things that are a net loss.
“A retreat, a period of solitude and contemplation is very wise.”
I certainly agree with that. Everyone needs to recharge his batteries every once in a while. Maybe you need to go on a sabbatical. But I’m having trouble figuring out how you can continue making your living as you do if you permanently cut yourself off from “the damned nooz.” From what I can see, all of your books, your articles, even this blog, are primarily based on what is happening in this country, especially in our government. “The nooz” is the raw material with which you work; it’s the springboard from which you leap off into your essays. I don’t know how a carpenter could function if he decided to eschew boards, and I don’t know what you would write about if you weren’t reasonably plugged in to current events.
““The nooz” is the raw material with which you work; it’s the springboard from which you leap off into your essays. I don’t know how a carpenter could function if he decided to eschew boards, and I don’t know what you would write about if you weren’t reasonably plugged in to current events.”
Yup. That’s a huuuuuuge part of the dilemma. Most of the things that are playing too large a role in my life are also things I require to earn my living. Not just nooz, but email and computer time in general.
“I didn’t make progress toward happy hermit-ness until I had something to work toward, rather than just things to give up.”
True words, Joel. But as to, “What do you hope to gain?” … other than nebulous, impossible things like peace of mind, I don’t know. Right now, I simply don’t know. That’s indeed a big part of my dilemma.
I think this is key, Claire:
“But I see only failure in situations like these — as well, of course, as in the much bigger failures to restore liberty (or even sanity!) to an increasingly totalitarian world.”
Why do you feel responsible for a “failure” if other people don’t fulfill their roles, their freely chosen obligations? I do understand how that happens, of course, since I suffered with that for years trying to work with Boy Scouts and various other organizations. But it is a killer to take on responsibility for more than your own part because there will ALWAYS be irresponsible people involved, to one degree or another. You have to get tough about it, do what you promised to do, and leave the rest. This is part of the false guilt thing.
In addition, if others see that you will assume additional responsibility (even if you think you don’t try to take on their jobs), the irresponsible will be only too glad to unload. And, if you spot any known irresponsible folks on future projects, you might consider that a red flag telling you that project is just ripe for your legitimate NO thanks, no matter how good it might be otherwise.
As for the totalitarian world… I suspect you don’t really think you can take it all on yourself. But we do get into that mode sometimes. I used to scream and fight and bloody my head on the brick wall of the Medicare (and other government) insanity that was destroying true medicine and the integrity of medical professionals all over the country. This was part of the stress that damn near killed me.
But I had to realize that I could not fight that battle if my goal was to eliminate or destroy Medicare. Far too big a bite for one old nurse. I found I had to withdraw from western medicine altogether to save my life, but I didn’t give up being a nurse for one moment. I found other ways to be what I was meant to be, but in places, people and practices that were small enough bites for me to handle on my own. I found alternative healing methods that actually worked much better to fill that role than all the pills and crap of so much of western medicine. I learned that I can only actually control my own life, and can only offer what I’ve learned to others. The water is there, but the horse has to drink it for himself.
I raged and fought and worried about the attacks on us re our right to self defense, our natural authority over our own lives and bodies. But it was far too big a problem for me to do much about, no matter how I raged or what I wrote.
So I started to carry a gun myself. I learned all I could about it, and became an instructor. I started a shooting clinic at the local range and work to introduce the women (not exclusively) around here to come and learn and take up their natural right to self defense. I am no happier about the national or world situation, of course, but I can only do something about a very small part of that. I wrote a small book about it, and so far have given away about 8,000 copies. A very tiny spit into a whirlwind, of course, but I don’t worry about it. Each person who reads it has to make up their own mind and do what they can. I don’t need to know, though the feedback has been most gratifying.
I can’t do something about everything. I can’t change the world or save it from itself. I’m not responsible for the world…
But I can do something about my own life, and by extension, help those around me to understand some of the problems and find their own answers – if they want answers, of course. I can’t do “nothing” simply because I can’t do everything. And I have to consider my plans, redirect my efforts, and cast off things that don’t work or which are harmful each and every day. “Doing something” is a journey, not a destination. 🙂
All excellent suggestions from the illustrious Commentariat!
May I just add one thought for now? Seems that last time you went hermity, you did so in part via inspiration from Julia Cameron’s book, The Artist’s Way. That book is all about “recovering” from creative blockage.
Perhaps another go at the book’s 12-week program, or parts of it that call to you, would be helpful? Particularly in light of Joel’s point about figuring out what you DO want and not merely what you want to ESCAPE.
By the way…even if you don’t take up the whole program this time around, I HIGHLY recommend re-reading Chapter 11: Recovering a Sense of Autonomy (I think it’s called; don’t have my copy handy). That chapter ROCKS. It’s all about honoring who you really are and what YOU really need.
Good luck!
Hi and thank you, Beth. Boy, it’s been a while since I re-visited The Artist’s Way. It was a wow of an experience the first time — the only truly helpful self-help book I ever read. Later I tried to read some later books in the series, which seemed to me they were only about Julia Cameron’s ego and an attempt to make more money off that one good thing.
But I’ll never forget the original impact that book had. Definitely at the moment I feel I need to re-establish ME as something separate from all demands, duties, fears, and expectations. Thanks for the good reminder.
MamaLiberty, you’re right once again in all you said. Thanks for reminding me of things that (on better days an in better moods) I should and usually do know.
Glad if you found the thought helpful, Claire. And hi, yourself. :^)
I have to agree with you about what I know of Cameron’s later books — they’re not replete with bang-on articulate revelations, and they tend to feel watered-down, repetitious, ponderous, and name-droppery — especially The Prosperous Heart (for which I’d had high hopes — oh, well…).
Here’s a link you might find enjoyable: articles and resources on hermits and solitude. http://www.hermitary.com/articles/
Also, two books I highly recommend: Anneli Rufus’s Party of One and Thomas Merton’s Raids on the Unspeakable (contains the full text of his excellent essay, “Rain and the Rhinoceros,” and several others of the same ilk).
Happy hermitting…hermitude…whatever you like.
Oh yeah … hermitary.com! I’d forgotten all about that. Just put Party of One on hold at the library, and while I couldn’t find that particular Merton book, I did find the “Rain” essay online:
http://piefurcation.blogspot.com/2006/04/rain-and-rhinoceros-by-thomas-merton.html
Glad to hear confirmation about Cameron’s later works. I wasn’t sure if it was “just me” or what.
I know you know that stuff, Claire. 🙂 Sometimes it is just good to get a confirmation. You’ll do just fine. Just trust yourself. 🙂
Ian Fleming on stuff that is almost relevant to this: http://www.mi6-hq.com/sections/articles/literary-ian-fleming-how-to-write-a-thriller?t&s&id=03763&utm_content=buffer4cebe&utm_medium=social&utm_source=facebook.com&utm_campaign=buffer
A.G. — Yes, yes! “Creating a vacuum” — absolutely necessary. Spot on! But of course the process of being sucked into that vacuum is alarming in itself. Just as you recoil from the work, you recoil from the emptiness before the work. And worse, in the vacuum state, you feel you’re a big bag o’ nothing, a big waste of space because you’re “not doing anything.” So you eventually have to produce something, just to be able to tolerate yourself. That’s it. Exactly.
I also enjoyed this bit from Fleming’s article: “Then the book is published and you start getting letters from people saying that Vent Vert is made by Balmain and not by Dior, that the Orient Express has vacuum and not hydraulic brakes, and that you have mousseline sauce and not Bearnaise with asparagus.”
LOL!
Claire,
I have used “not being in control” to help me “stay in control”. For example I wanted to get off line for a while to gain some perspective, so when my computer got drunk on too much wine I just did not get another for a while (9 months). Now that I am back online occasionally, my solar panels limit me to sunny days for a few hours each. Works out pretty well in fighting the compulsion of 24/7 contact, although I can still do a bit of writing when the modem goes off.
Now I know that you need better and timelier access but a few timers that you can adjust might give you a guideline.
I agree that finding what you want is important although limiting what you don’t want can help.
I hear people say all the time that they want to get off the grid but it’s just too hard. I say ridiculous! You can be off the grid in 5 minutes. Just turn off your electric power at the circuit box, turn the gas and water off and “presto”, you are off the grid. Of course clawing your way back to the 20th (or 21st) century is another story.
I’m not really much help but Claire, please do NOT doubt the benefit your writing has been to thousands and thousands of people struggling to understand, including me. Thank you for that Sweet Lady. THANK YOU!
“please do NOT doubt the benefit your writing has been to thousands and thousands of people struggling to understand, including me. Thank you for that Sweet Lady. THANK YOU!”
Amen, a thousand times!
Just make that writing a labor of love, bringing you some peace and joy. Makes it all the sweeter. 🙂
Just found my copy of “I Am Not A Number!” Thought I’d lost it somewhere. Now I have to loan it to someone who really needs it. LOL May never see it again, but that’s OK. I got what I needed from it long ago. Past time to hand it on.
Claire,
I just had another thought, which came very suddenly and strong. You just need a buffer, an executive assistant that doesn’t intrude or control but protects your privacy and your most valuable resources. Your time, your writing and your spirit.
Look at the bright side, Claire. Not being married, you can become a hermit when and how you please. You may still have to negotiate with others, but you don’t have to live with ’em.
I too am a computer junkie but it doesn’t bother me much that I am. I check email once a week.
Embrace the obligations God gives you, and disregard all others. The devil is in the details of sorting the two out. For example, it seems to have been some kind of dark solitude for Merton, and anything but for Mother Teresa.
I suspect that some of the obligations you heap upon yourself — that some part of you deep down knows that you really do in fact need to do — are of the former sort. Rather than flee from them, figure out how to embrace them. I’m talking about an obligation not to spend too much time in front of a computer, an obligation to heed inner calls for reflection and solitude, an obligation to create, an obligation to develop and use your gifts and talents.
As an aside, I’m surprised you’re hopeful about Sam Harris. I’d view his claim that there’s no such thing as free will to be antithetical to just about everything this blog stands for.
It also occurs to me that my friend MG knows a bit about hermitting. I’ll have to see if I can convince him to stop by.
Dana, I’ve listened for the voice of God all my life. Not a whisper, not a squeak.
I somehow suspect God never sat down and gave Thomas Merton that nice, pat explanation he quotes, either. But Merton, having a huge ego (not a bad thing) and wanting to devote his life to God, simply inserted God into the story to explain his (Merton’s) own inclinations and desires.
Not that I think Merton was a fraud. The struggles and yearnings he writes about resonate deeply, and clearly the guy changed one small, but vital, part of the world because of both what he believed and what he longed for. Every modern hermit in the western world owes a huge debt to Merton. But that quote? Those words God supposedly said? Merton just made that up. Pretty cheeky. Pretty presumptuous.
And though I risk being too irreverent here, I can’t help but note that “God” eventually struck Merton down with civilization’s equivalent of a lightning bolt. http://mertoninasia.blogspot.com/2008/12/thomas-merton.html
OTOH, you speak wisdom here: “I’m talking about an obligation not to spend too much time in front of a computer, an obligation to heed inner calls for reflection and solitude, an obligation to create, an obligation to develop and use your gifts and talents.” And that’s so whether it came to you from a deity or just … from you.
Yes, your friend “Mick Mick” (oh, poor guy!) does seem to know a lot about hermiting. Thank you for the link.
And finally, Sam Harris. I don’t have to agree with everything he says to learn from him. He also says that “there is no self,” an assertion that is as trendy as it is unproven. But I like him because he’s a genuine spiritual seeker and not a dogmatist like his fellow atheist, Mr. Dawkins.
Tahn, you’re always such an original thinker! Timers. Now that’s seriously an idea. Monastic bells would be better, but timers would do the job.
I would love to hear how your computer came to over-imbibe on wine.
As to that buffer-person … Oh, yeah. I’ve longed for that person about as long as I’ve been semi-hemi-demi-quasi-pseudo famous. Trouble is, even if such a paragon existed, he or she would want (and deserve) to be paid. You know, actual money.
A similar discussion came up in an email exchange recently. Traditionally “real” publishers do a lot of things to make life easier for writers — but these days, only for the big writers. The mid-list and minor writers like me are increasingly on our own. And while in this age of ebooks, that’s not necessarily a bad thing, and could be a very good one for many, it means that writers are taking on more and more non-writing work all the time, and there’s nobody to take any of that work off their shoulders because most writers don’t make enough to make it worth anyone’s while.
Nice thought, though.