A friend emailed this and I had to share. NB: It might not be safe for your nine-year-old to read.
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Harlequin romance — 2011 edition
He grasped me firmly, but gently, just above my elbow and guided me into a room, his room. Then he quietly shut the door and we were alone. He approached me soundlessly, from behind, and spoke in a low, reassuring voice close to my ear.”Just relax.”
Without warning, he reached down and I felt his strong, calloused hands start at my ankles, gently probing, and moving upward along my calves, slowly but steadily. My breath caught in my throat.
I knew I should be afraid, but somehow I didn’t care. His touch was so experienced, so sure. When his hands moved up onto my thighs, I gave a slight shudder, and partly closed my eyes. My pulse was pounding. I felt his knowing fingers caress my abdomen, my ribcage. And then, as he cupped my firm, full breasts in his hands, I inhaled sharply.
Probing, searching, knowing what he wanted, he brought his hands to my shoulders, slid them down my tingling spine and into my panties. Although I knew nothing about this man, I felt oddly trusting and expectant. This is a man, I thought. A man used to taking charge. A man not used to taking ‘No’ for an answer. A man who would tell me what he wanted. A man who would look into my soul and say …
…
…
…
…
… (keep going)
…
…
… (here it comes …)
“Okay ma’am, you can board your flight now.”

I want to laugh and cry and puke all at the same time now.
He had me at “Hello” …
Simply beautiful…
Ewwww!
I think all 9-year-old’s should read it so they know what to expect when they fly to nanny’s house.
As a matter of fact where is the TSA pamphlet/coloring book “It’s OK to touch me there!” or would that be considered child pornography?
Even Harlequin can’t make flying (now a days) enticing…..
Bleah. But I’ll pass it along. 🙂
https://www.facebook.com/pages/Boycott-Flying/126801010710392
Then again, maybe I won’t pass it along. It’s a little too disgusting… 🙂
Mark — Understood. And on your site, most people might just see the punchline coming long before it arrives. Keep up the good work.
Thanks, Claire. We’re in it for the long haul.
Well, there’s the big “let-down” of the day….